The term “sex addiction” has gained traction in popular media and self-help circles over the last few decades. It implies that a person’s sexual urges or behaviors are out of control in a way similar to how drugs or alcohol might be for someone with a substance use disorder. This model is based on the idea that people can become “addicted” to sex in the same way they can to substances, experiencing cravings, withdrawal, and a compulsive need to engage in the behavior, even when it leads to negative consequences.
However, this concept is controversial in the clinical world. Many experts, including the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), do not support the sex addiction model. AASECT’s stance is clear: it does not endorse sex addiction as a valid diagnosis or concept. The organization points out that labeling sexual behavior as an “addiction” can often be overly simplistic and can lead to further shame and stigma, especially when the behavior may be linked to unresolved emotional issues, trauma, or cultural and religious factors that shape a person’s understanding of their sexuality.
Sexual health and well-being are fundamental aspects of human life, but when sexual behavior becomes problematic, it can lead to confusion, shame, and frustration. As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker-Supervisor and Certified Sex Therapist, I often work with individuals struggling to understand their sexual behaviors and whether they might be dealing with “sex addiction” or what is known as Out of Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB). These terms are often used interchangeably, but they refer to different understandings of problematic sexual behavior.
According to AASECT, problematic sexual behaviors are better understood through a more nuanced lens, taking into account the complexity of human sexuality. The idea that someone can be addicted to sex reduces a complex issue to a diagnosis that may not address the underlying emotional, relational, or psychological issues.
Instead of using the term “sex addiction,” AASECT advocates for addressing problematic sexual behavior by understanding it in the context of personal values, relationships, mental health, and physical health. This approach avoids the pathologization of normal sexual urges and instead emphasizes helping individuals develop healthy and satisfying sexual relationships that align with their personal values.
Out of Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB) offers a more compassionate and comprehensive way to understand these issues. OCSB refers to a pattern of sexual behavior that feels unmanageable or inconsistent with a person’s values and goals. This might include compulsive use of pornography, engaging in frequent casual sexual encounters, or spending excessive time and energy seeking sexual activities that disrupt daily life.
Unlike the sex addiction model, OCSB doesn’t assume that sexual behavior is inherently the problem. Instead, it focuses on how sexual behavior becomes problematic when it conflicts with an individual’s values or begins to interfere with important aspects of life, such as work, relationships, or personal well-being. Often, OCSB is linked to underlying emotional issues, such as anxiety, depression, trauma, or even a lack of understanding of one’s own sexual desires and needs.
If you find yourself struggling with sexual behaviors that feel out of control, you don’t need to label yourself as a “sex addict” to get help. Instead, sex therapy offers a supportive and non-judgmental space to explore the underlying causes of these behaviors and work towards developing a healthy, fulfilling sexual life that aligns with your values.
In therapy, we’ll explore not just the behavior itself but the emotions, thoughts, and relational patterns that may be contributing to it. By addressing these deeper issues, you’ll find more effective and lasting solutions than simply trying to control or suppress your sexual urges. Therapy helps in understanding what you truly want and need from your sexuality, allowing you to develop a healthier relationship with yourself and your sexual desires.
If you’re struggling with Out of Control Sexual Behavior and seeking compassionate, effective therapy, I’m here to help. Whether you’re in Prosper, Frisco, Plano, Dallas, Houston, San Antonio, or Wichita Falls, I offer in-person and online therapy sessions throughout Texas. Together, we can work towards restoring balance in your life, reducing shame, and helping you develop a healthy, satisfying sexual identity that aligns with your values.
Sexual health is an important part of overall well-being. You don’t have to face this alone—reach out today for a supportive, judgment-free approach to addressing your concerns. Schedule your first session with me today, and let’s begin the journey toward sexual health and balance.
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